my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Luke did at least 8 shots of pure mayonnaise last night. I am not sure if that is better or worse than my 2 cement mixers?
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Had to sacrifice my vibrator batteries to the thermostat gods. I had a dirty dream and also almost a heat stroke.
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
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