Ikea night.
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Insert tab A into swedish slot B
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
we turned dreidel into a drinking game. i kept landing on gimel. im glad we have 7 more nights of this
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SHE has hooked up with both me and my sister. I don't even know what to say. If she goes for my parents next I may have to kill her
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Two questions: Did you enjoy your birthday present and how did i wake up with glitter all over my dick?
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