So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Bigbird is at the bar Im at. whats her name
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
Awesome. My fame will spread to DC... As will the herpes.
it was like i was on a global safari of uncircumcised men
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
Aj and I already plan to tape our thumbs to our palms so we know how it feels to be a t-rex.
Still slightly drunk, sitting in Hyde park village. Two small children are dancing and singing "call me maybe" on the fountain in front of me. Am I hallucinating?
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
I'm literally 40 minutes from where I was supposed to stay. I woke up in a parking lot.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I feel like it should at least be like a "hey look I'm actually fine that I drunkenly gave you my virginity!" friend request.
I dont even remember what i was saying but just one minute i was crying and the next i was showing u my genitals
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
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