When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
can you imagine how much money lesbians save on birth control?!?
bitches.
I passed out leaning next to a light pole. When the cop woke me up at 4 AM, I told him I was a block away from the apt, just had to stop to make a puke pit stop.
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
In class ... We were just assigned groups for the quarter... Remember that night we took shots from that guys pants? I now know his name
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
Apparently, the Mormons have taken over airports. I was told by a befuddled looking clerk I couldn't buy a beer with breakfast before 6am.
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
well considering the guy who just delivered my cookies had to console me as i had a mental breakdown in front of him i'd say i'm 4/10 right now, thank you
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
i woke up to drewlling on a plate of eggrolls half naked halfway between my bed and the floor, and i have no idea where my pants went
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