Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
Shitshow foam night was such a success
I'm pretty sure my liver died in Reno and my intestines are doing hula hoops around my asshole. The bachelor party was that good.
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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