Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Just grabbed my laptop and a beer to take a shit. Mom gave me a look of disgust. I miss college.
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Even my vagina gasped.
So much beer in the passenger seat the seatbelt light is blinking
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
Knowing that he goes to voodoo every Thursday really makes me want to get myself checked.
I feel a whole lot better than i did this morning at 3 when one of my roommates discovered me slightly aware of my surroundings and naked in the bath tub with the shower on
maby next time we don't finish the whole box wine just because it tastes like shit
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
Randomize
