I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
3 guesses about who had to still-drunkenly facilitate a fire drill at 2:40am because freshmen can't handle microwave popcorn.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
HE'S BRINGING FRIED MAC AND CHEESE BITES. I GET FRIED MAC AND CHEESE AND SEX PEOPLE. BEST WEDNESDAY EVER.
THIS CHICK IS LIKE SOME SORT OF HOOKER HOUDINI.
DUDE FUCK CALL ME SHE HAS GRANDKIDS
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I know I'm not a hook-up kind of chick but he is a firefighter & an EMS worker. I felt like maybe I'd be a good person if I let a good person inside of me
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
My father has a definite type: blonde, busty, 18-22. It was awkward when I was in college, but now I'm over it. I play wingman for him and he buys me expensive purses for the assistance in getting him hooked up with girls younger than me. Win-win.
Randomize
