foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
If you can't do the LSAT hung over. You can't do the LSAT. That's the real practice.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
it's my fake id's birthday. i'm wearing a hat, and i have a beard. i'm untouchable. TO THE BARS!
Randomize
