He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
you duct taped a twenty to your thigh just in case and passed out.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
I don't know if this whole sobriety thing is going to work out... It's only been 3 days and I want to chug vodka
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
lol I'll trade you jello for a tampon
what a trade!
i believe in u and ur pee
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
I need some buff guys to cuddle me and call me precious
If it makes you feel any better I almost got kicked out of the bar for yelling "enjoy your celebratory incest"
I love you.
Randomize
