I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
do u usually make out with people before telling them your name???
I think you came in my ear last night and I had to pick it out infront of my kids in class today
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
you spent 5 minutes trying to open an empty PBR and kept saying "don't worry i'll get it i've been working out"
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
Highlight of my night: you taking that shot of garlic butter and then throwing the empty container down on the stairs and saying FUCK.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
Randomize
