Do you know how when animals have surgery they put those cones around their heads so they can't lick their wounds so they can heal? I think someone should invent that for human emotions.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
Not my type, but the penis looks fun.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
I'm so happy we share a mutual love of laughing at religion.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
i gotta say this to some one...... my penis feels sooooooooo sooooooft, its amazing
like for real, sooooooooooooooo smoooooooooooooth its amazing
I can't wait for you to read this text tomorrow
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