Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
My present? It was a fake boarding pass he made in Photoshop. He litterally just gave me a one way ticket to Pound Town
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
I just compared his sexting to a plate of spaghetti. And he STILL wants to sleep with me.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
