the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
please remember that your boobs are bigger than your sisters. when you borrow her shirts they stretch and then shes left flapping in the breeze. dont borrow her clothes anymore. love dad.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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