I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im pretty sure this vending machine only exists when im drunk
Found crayons in my cigarette pack. I can't help but feel you may be responcible.
She wasnt impressed wen i brought a guy for her back with me, a 3am impromptu sperm donor is not a gd birthday present. Im a bad gf.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
It was his birthday and he drunkenly offered me Portillo's and diamonds in exchange for a snap chat of my boobs. Even sober it seemed like a good idea at 3 in the morning.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
You need to stop telling people you gained weight over the holidays. You've been fat since July.
I woke up and there was a huge blow up palm tree in my bed...
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