Duck Duck Cougar?
So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
she told me her two favorite things were grocery stores and dick.
either i blacked out mid-sex but remember the beginning and end, or he really only lasted a couple of minutes
she scratched her sororities letters into my back when she was done. i think i was part of some sick game. sick twisted sexy game
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Names, who you're caught in bed with, both minor details
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
for the record im never blowing a guy on the toilet again, that was sad and degrading
I can't hangout tonight, I have a phone sex appointment at 10
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
