I hate fucking guys that don't drink coffee. My morning hangover and shame will not be cured by your stupid tea.
I feel violated. a guy just did an ultrasound on my balls. He made eye contact..
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
I am literally the only girl who can black out and wake up pantsless and STILL be 99% sure I didn't get any.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and it seems i've caught your masturbating bug. thanks.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
I JUST FARTED SO LOUD AND HARD I IMMEDIATELY TASTED IT
You would be successful and sober without me. you can't turn your bakon me now
On a scale of 1 to 10 how good of an idea would it be to pregame at the airport right now
Ten
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize