what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
i live my life in a constant state of hangover.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
What happened on tuesday that a stripper knows my full name?
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
THANK YOU for not letting me make out with that girl omfg I was one step away from a foursome in the handicapped stall
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Randomize
