Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am currently exfoliating my skin with the toilet. We've never been so close.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
STD scares really help you understand the whole six degrees of separation thing...
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
She invited me to Bikini Yoga with her friends. Sounds promising.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
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