She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
In attempts to Not be THAT GIRL in front of my new crush I will only drink a 12 pack instead of my normal case.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
just reminessing about the wedding and were they seriously to tight to serve a meal oorrrrrr was it just another one of my black-out-by-dinner drunks
the fact that you actualy have a 'black-out-by-dinner drunk' is a bit deserving..
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
Randomize
