So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Just got kicked out of the ocean for being "unsafe".
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
Who knew drunk me could climb a 17 story building for apple juice and sex
Clearly the ONLY reason why you were voted employee of the month is because of your upside-down beer funneling skills.
Her craziness is the sexiest thing about her.
I can't wait to read your obituary.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
fucked a girl in the dry storage closet at work. knocked over a whole rack of tomato paste and pinto beans. and also i really hope my manager doesn't review this footage from the security camera
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
im about to bake her parents a "thank you for making such beautiful babies, ive had sex with all 5 of them" cake
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Will you PLEASE get your mom to stop telling me I'd make a great husband? She knows I'm gay, right?!
I know, but she really likes you. Have you met my brother yet?
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