with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
Telling her that my penis is called megatron was not a good idea for a first date.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
So the first 4 hours of my morning was equivalent to seeing under water. Things were starting to get better until I remember I drank mustard for free stuff and flossed my teeth with a strand of hair from a stranger in the bathroom.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I shotgunned a beer immediately puked and rallied. And by rallied I mean had sex in the bathroom after he held my hair.
What a gentleman.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
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