I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
It's like a parade of train wrecks.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Fingerblasting some girl on the deck tryna get her to fuck on a lifeboat
Things you do not want to hear after sex: I almost lost my gum in your pussy. Really dude, don't share that with me!
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I'm just sitting here drunk and eating peas because my life sucks
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
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