just used clorox wipes to give myself a whores bath. hello finals week
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell me not to purchase 500 ball pit balls and a kiddy pool
No
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
I think your dad took our porno
I was doing karaoke to "baby got back" and apologizing for being white at the same time.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
This is the nicest bathroom I've ever been drunk in. The urinal is gold.
You just thought it would be a good idea to show your penis to your best friend. No harm, no foul.
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