Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I'm holding in my pee so that I can hear "Cowboy" in its entirety on the radio
you probably should not have drank the wine that everyone spits out. and the sad part, that was not even your low point last night
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
The vomit I understand but how is there seaweed in my bed?
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
Are you available to help carry me into the house Monday?
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
She's chasing the cat around the house hitting it with a cardboard sword yelling "there can be only one!"
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize
