I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
She's more of a "I'm gonna get herpes no matter how great her face looks like" pretty
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Looks like breakfast in bed is out the window. She can't get up because I "fucked her into paralysis." My stomach is not happy with my dick right now
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Once I hang curtains in my truck bed that'll be feasible
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
He's pretending to be my boyfriend so that my family won't bother us when we sneak off to smoke weed
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
Randomize
