Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
Oh the joys of strong arming a man into exclusivity
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I'm here to help build your repertoire of drunken shenanigans and I should have been arrested stories
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I don't mean to alarm you but are the strongest testicles in the family. I just learned I can lift 90 lb with my balls! Beat that.
Randomize
