it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
just bailed mom out of jail. Tell me i'm not the favorite child
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Ok, Jen and I are going out tonight and getting rowdy. I think you and Steph need to come. I understand if you can't, but not going out means you're automatically obligated to post bail. If necessary.
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
Lets get real here, ive seen your moms breasts multiple times
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
Just check with her if girls can get blown, that's all.
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Randomize
