matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
I froze in his sixty one degree room but i came so hard. Like fucking the eskimo god.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
I think "we've never met sober" is a great relationship to have with someone
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
God specifically crafted these hands to deal out orgasms.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
Randomize
