your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
he somehow instantly knew i was from vermont.
it probably had something to do with chasing your soco with maply syrup.
I watched her choke out a bouncer with the broken strap from her purse, I think shes the one.
for the record, graham crackers won't get the taste of cock out of your mouth. also we're out of graham crackers
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
the kid throwing up and laying face down on the deck just asked ME if I'M okay...
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
I seriously just caught my Pina colada from falling of a table perfectly facing up. I will now reward myself by finishing this one and then getting my 8th
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
Randomize
