i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
sarcasm needs its own font
So Easter dinner for me was at 4:40 this morning where i made Bagel Bites and had a glass of Chardonnay
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i have a picture in my phone of you with a bottle of tequila in your back pocket. i believe you were saying "pocket of champions" or something along those lines
It's so cute when the exchange student uses "blowjob" as a verb.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
I NEED YOU HERE TO KNOCK THE MALT BEVERAGES OUT OF MY MOUTH
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
On Tinder, guy asked me if I had ever been fucked by a Pokemon master. Needless to say I didn't respond.
Two words: blizzard sex
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Randomize