covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I'm about to get my nails done. Would the polish name "meet me at the altar" be too straight forward for a first date?
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
Ok you had this coming you put a sponsored filter on a dick pic
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
i believe in u and ur pee
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Randomize
