I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
She was that classic mixture between "Hell no" and "Why the fuck not."
My piss changed color midstream. Think that means I have a 50/50 chance of passing the test?
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
Well we went from the roof to the stairwell to an air mattres. One day were going to fuck in a bed
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
maybe you met your husband and you just don't know it yet
and other hilarious jokes you can tell yourself
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
