After last night I still want u
But please keep that on the DL
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
You should be proud. How many people can say they GAVE a stripper an std?
Drunk puking in my bathtub has plugged it up for the third time this year. I hate these calls to my landlord.
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
mom how many of the songs from my childhood are mexican drinking songs?
all of them.
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
If Denver makes it to the Super Bowl I'll quit drinking. So I'm pretty much stocking up on booze
Why the fuck am I at this dorm meeting? I don't pay $50,000 a year to stay sober.
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize