do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
Why are you covered in frosting?
Friend's birthday situation turned into enlightened cake orgy.
Why's my alcoholism being used to prove a point?
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
The whiskey is fighting the tequila on who wants to be the one who end my night first.
god. I was just thinkin about the fact that there was a time in our life when we didn't drink.
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
I call it a party but only because that sounds better than 8 people getting drunk around a pool.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
There was this blissful moment of peace and quiet... then you ran past our window with a lit firecracker in hand going, "SHIT. SHIT. SHIT!"
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
Randomize
