My body isn't even mad at me...just disappointed
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
Is it some european holiday today? We both woke up to find loaves of bread in our rooms...
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
He bought me a burrito. I introduced him as "Horse-Dicked Jake" all night. My debt has been repaid.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Okay so I just had a really great idea
no.
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
You're the air beneath my wings and the lookout when I pee
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
Randomize
