wake up i wanna do it froggy style
Hot mess moment: I just made really spicy guac and picked my nose, which set it on fire. I tried to neti pot it with a coffee pot, which resulted in me gagging and puking all over my bf's bathroom. oopsie.
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
drunk her ninja stole one of the pizzas as it arrived and hid all of the pieces in a cereal box in the fridge.Genius.
Trust me. I don't get home before 5am. I know what Immmm doing. BTW bail money is in my closet. PEACE
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
What drinking game we play yesterday? Fight club or something?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
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