We're facebook friends in real life
windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
Sorry I couldn't get my dick out
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
#1 RULE OF DRINKING: DELETE YOUR EX'S NUMBER FROM YOUR PHONE
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Ask him to get me chedder bratwurst instead of the molly
Unless if you guys already left. Then I want the molly
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Is "You've never made me cum." an acceptable breakup line?
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize
