dude wtf did we explode in my microwave last night?
idk but i think it had a face
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
you tried to clear everyones facebook status so that yours would be the only one on everyones home page
Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
They need a stunt cock, be about 20 more minutes.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
Randomize
