If only Ben were 51% gay instead of 49%
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
Drinking Grey Goose on the toilet. Don't make me graduate.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
He just pulled a Spanish chick using google translate!!!! We are at the bar and she speaks zero English. Hes a fucking magician!!!!!!
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
would you eat cereal with weed in it
who is this???
Randomize
