so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
my dad just secretly slid me a nugg in front of my mom. remind me why I moved away for college??
Little spoons don't ask big questions
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
Why the fuck is he under my phone as Papi Chulo?
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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