Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
I'm sorry I'm just not ready to become vampire yet
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
I can't get into him, he looks really young. I'd feel like I was blowing the Gerber baby.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
Can I come take down that wallpaper yet? I stopped seeing that dude and I need to occupy my time with something besides getting drunk at bingo night and cussing out old people. Also, i'm not sure on the legal stipulations but I might have, unintentionally, committed grand theft auto at some point.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
I was just thinking about all the dick I could catch while I am home. But then I realized I am too lazy to get out of my pjs and leave my cat.
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I told him to take his man panties off and take the fucking Jaeger bomb already, so no to a 2nd date
I don't like kids.
You were literally holding a baby 5 minutes ago
I like them before they learn to speak and after they learn to think.
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