I'm jealous of your bromance
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I just found those cheese sticks in my purse. Along with a handful of confetti.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Dude I left his house at 5:30 a.m. after you peed on his front door and then tried to fight me for my blanket. Don't even do that at my house or I will end you.
hahahahaha. Worst. Text. Ever.
Randomize
