Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
um i just realized that some of the people at my family reunion look inbred. thats not a good sign.
hahaha beady eyes set close together? defs inbred.
my dads cousin just put a cig in his dogs mouth and says, "look its a commercial for newport!" holy hell i hope im adopted.
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
make sure you eat your skittles last so when you barf you can barf RAINBOWS.
I'm glad you enjoy my eating disorder so much.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
theres a turtle on the table. helping me eat my ramon noodles.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
I'm pretty sure I had my drunk fortune told by a gay Miss Cleo last night. At least it's advice sober me can agree with.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
i had a flashback to you roaring like a dying tiger and then throwing your wallet (maybe?) at the cat in the living room and saying "you're the only adult that lives here take all my money"
She won't let me meet her hot new boy toy just because she thinks it'll lead to us having a threesome. It's not fair. I thought we were friends...
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