I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
Randomize
