How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I wiped a tear off her cheek with my boner. It cheered her up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
please dont pick me up from the airport dressed like a terrorist.
Nobody has ever asked me for my honest opinion on whether they needed anal bleaching before
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
why are our drunk alter egos so much more successful than us?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
The dopest dose you'll ever dose. I felt like an octopus all of thursday
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
I called you daddy and let you stick things in my butt, I am a damn 11.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize