dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
I JUST WOKE UP ON A TRAIN
I SHUDNT B ON A TRAIN
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
I couldn't function. I was to the point where I was using a bottle cap as a monocle.
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
he was snoring so I have him a bj to wake him up and then told him he had to leave.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
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