I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
You have no idea what this goes for my ego. I literally made you cum in your sleep.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People were staring and acting all judgmental and offended... Like they've never seen anyone breastfeed in a liquor store.
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I was drunk and on Craigslist.. The drunk-text offers people got must have been either horrifying or glorious
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
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