just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
He told me i was the nicest person he's ever arrested for DUI
I don't remember her name, but I do remember yelling at her from the balcony of the hotel room during her walk of shame.
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
Woke up to the frozen soundtrack blasting in the living room best one night stand ever
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Your uterus is safe from my father's misconstrued prophecies.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
Randomize