I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
Why do I feel like I'm not the only one drinking to make my night class teacher look better?
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
Wasted on the beach. There's children everywhere. A six year old girl even stood over me with her hands on her waist looking down on me as I was passing out by the water
I'm hoping that banging a 24 year old 3 times cancels out banging that freshman on Wednesday
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
I joked that if anyone could fuck a 35 year old woman while wearing head bands and arm sweat bands it's you and look what happens.
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
Randomize