oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
I'm sitting at the bar eating dinner next to a nerd, a guy in a 10 gallon hat, and a policeman. I feel like I joined The Village People
hah yeah. there was a kid puking in the bathroom and this idiot brings in a potted plant and was like "yeah he's like, not getting enough oxygen"
in the bathroom helping her wash cum out her eye. pretty much explains my sex life
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I just busted my piggy bank to afford McDonald's. This is my personal cry for help.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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